enduring weddings..

Received four wedding invitations this Sunday. Three of the reception will be at noon -4pm and another one will be a Chinese-style wedding dinner. OMFG..I'll go bulimic surely, if I decide to show up for all.

Let's face it, there's usually about three out of ten weddings that I (or you) can really get excited about and trully want to get my sorry ass to the meaningful events (without having hidden agenda like oogling at men in baju melayu..I'm such a sucker for them!). For the rest of the peeps, well, I just need to "make an appearance" - you know, exchanging fake smiles with aunties and uncles while enduring their famous quote of "KAHWINLAH ANDA SEBELUM ANDA DIKAHWINKAN" and passing along the red-packet...all for the sake of perpetuating the thinly veiled fabrication that I actually care.. seriously...

Plus, the cards says, Miss Jannah Zarmani and partner. I'm pretty sure that other peeps will bring their other half and as usual, will start pestering me to get one pronto if I show up alone. Not to mention, their pesky unwanted advise about love and career. Forgive me for venting here for a sec, but can you people just keep your mouth shut or stuff some food instead? I need space to breathe too.

And to mutual friends of Mr.Ehem and myself, please God please, just leave your sympathetic glance at home. Yea, its written all over your faces! Here's some newsflash - I'm seeing single because all good men are either taken, gay or they decide to devote themselves in some monastry. What's left are guys who have absolutely no clue of what women (or themselves) wants, in which, if I'm stupid enough not to restrain myself from believing there's a silver lining, it will only lead to an extraordinary waste of time. And frankly, I have no energy to start something more than flirting in this century, enough said, full stop

Whateverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!

I'm going full force on sharpening my sarcasm to endure the hassle of "making appearance" this weekend. Come what may.. I WILL bite if provoked. /Jann doing the Bruce Lee's famous celet kat hidung..

pamphlet of vocabs..

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom.

The first and only book that I actually fell in love with. Contrary to friends and foe believes, I DO read books....just not triller or some heavy drama (maze storyline) type of book. Nope, not a Grisham's or political-demagogy content fan. That's why I don't read newspaper, lol.

I don't read books these days. My mind's too tired to cope up with the reading. Maybe that's the reason my vocab has gone down the drain and my overall English (spoken and written) is getting worse. My brain's a wee bit slow in catching up jargons and I rarely utter or use any bombastic words anymore. Its like when I open my mouth to speak, I sound like I have a pea-sized brain. Oh, bugger..

I blame Apek for this. Yup, all his fault. For conversing in Manglish.. merogol Bahasa Inggerisku.. ;Þ

Sigh, need to do something about it... its appaling really..

=|

I wish I can sleep without all the care in the world like Ewok.. can't sleep..can't sleep.. feeling edgy most days..

5.01am..

Its 5.01 am.

Can't freaking get shut eyes, all thanks to KACIP FATIMAH coffee. Am losing my voice. My lips' red and looks like it has been stung by a bee. My head...whoa~.... pening lalat tahap maksima exponential and I'm sweating like a pig - that is, if pig have sweating glands. I'm not horny thou'.. hehe. My minds' pretty occupied with the gathering earlier - had great companies, good food and a fun atmosphere.... *smile* *smile* *smile*

Wokeh, gotta scoot...!!

Gotta drag my 'liability' ass to work - gotta be in MCA building by 6.30am. Sigh, Miss Jann got no life but work at odd hours with people who seriously need to get another job.. they should follow my footstep, kan bahagia hidup walaupun pocket bulimic... ;)

importanté..

I keep on asking myself this particular question today - "what's really important in life?". Sadly I couldn't find the answer eventhou' I raked my brain the entire day. I reckon, when it comes to what's really important, it differs to different people. The answer is usually easy to side-step as most of us are overwhelmed in life's chaos and all the dramas, and are busy reaching for the goals in life.

And sometimes, its tempting to dismiss our close ones, in hope that the lost time would be repaid when we finally gloried in our achievements in future. Sometimes, we even postponed today's happiness in hope that one fine day, we will actually find it. But isn't it sadistic that, sometimes, when we tend to hold out for everything we thought we wanted in life, in the end we got away with nothing? All because we dismiss what's important in the first place. Gosh, that's plain sad.

So, tell me. What is really important in life? It irks me that I don't have the answer. I sure hope that someday I'll realized - before the most important thing slips away.

is it just me?

Is it just me or he's just a bore?
Is it just me or did he woke up on the wrong side of the bed every goddamn day?
Is it just me or there's a rule not to rub him the wrong way?
Is it just me or he's actually a woman dealing with PMS?

Or...
Is it just me, being my plain old self, unconsciously intimidating his over inflated male ego?

jackass got himself a diamond..

"You know how I am, Jannah. I have temper and no patience whatsoever! And she understands, she know how to handle me. You know how I can be...I'm the coolest easy going guy with my peeps but I am a completely different man when I'm with her. It irks me that she gets me everytime. I don't know what I should do. I know if I give it a try, it will work out. But at the same time, everytime I want to move forward, I stumbled. And I took a step back instead. I think I'm afraid of commitment."

What can I say, bro? You know I can give good advise to peeps but am clueless as a schoolgirl when its my turn to play Juliet. Althou' I'll make the worst Juliet in all history - just not cut for all the drama, I'm sure of one thing. If she can accept the jackass that you are, you're in for a really good deal. ;)


***************************************

Sorry, some additional words I'd like to say.
Bro, be a man pls. Stop being a woman (fickle-minded). Step up to the plate, take a swing and hit homerun already! She ain't waiting for you forever, you know. She's really a good candidate for a life partner.

Hint: She's a sucker for white lilies.

Here's a picture of a gorgeous bouquet of white lilies, just in case you're clueless how white lilies look like.. *shrug*

APIIT Multicultural Night 2007..

Since its my last year in APIIT, I was thinking.. what the heck, just go laaa.. So there I was last night with my traditional white kebaya and Indonesian batik and Sing with his red Gong Xi Fa Chai shirt.

The event was................. okay la. The sound system was pretty bad thou'. All we can hear was the beat of the background music. Can't hear a thing what was babbled by the emcees. Highlights of the night (for me anyways) was the performance by The Black Tribes, bunch of Africans singing the Raggae beats and soothing numbers. They're bunch of fantastic dancers btw.. ohh.. sooo.. au naturel.. sayang, didn't get to snap pictures of them... I was busy grooving along.. ;p

Sing syiok-syiok snap pics wt leng lui.. And this guy painted himself like PAS supporter without even knowing what PAS is.. cool siot...

Anyways, here's a few snapshots, not as clear thou', mind my cikai Kodak camera.. ;p

The traditional Acheh dance by Indonesian students.. lead by my buddy, Winny Hasfiani. The coordination was simply superb..

Iranian instrumental performance.. Kevin and bunch of guys beside me was cheering for the lady sitting in the middle...it was her voluptious curves that turned them into monkeys... Haih, boys..

That's Adam (jumping lead singer) and Amzar (far left) performing 'I feel good', the NTV7 theme song. Adam promised to sing my fav More Than Words but they changed the song last minute. So, Adam my dear boy, you still owe me that song.. ;)

Yea, we've been stamped by some weird cop mohor/tattoo. Sing and I felt like we were joining some Yakuza clan instead of just entering Multicultural night event....hehe.

Overall, it was okaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy la.

Would be better if I were to sing some Malay ballads or perform some badass tarian Ulik Mayang (yes, I do traditional dance) and if Sing were to sing Isabella or Suci Dalam Debu.. ffuuhh... gamat~!

hamsap taxi driver..

I was seduced by a fifty-something filthy hamsap cinapek cabbie just now. He keep on asking whether I was sleepy and suggested that I take a nap while he drives me home in his smelly cab. He even asked me all sorts of personal questions.. whether I have a boyfriend, whether I prefer Chinese over Malay for a guy.. yada yada... Gatal nak mampus!

He even tore a piece of..... what I suspect is actually a page from buku kotak-kotak (you know, the one we use for Math in primary school) and scribbled his number. And the way he pass that small piece of paper was juuuuuuuuuusssst some classic move from a hamsap-minded dickhead laaa.... by sliding it up on my right hand.. EEEeewwwwwww... GUGUR my bulu roma!

I took his blardee number of course.., althought I badly wanted to stab him with my keys (substitute for my pepper-spray). Was afraid that he would do something silly if I try to piss him off... like drive me somewhere secluded and turn into a sex maniac or a pychopath. Man, I could sula him really bad if he have that kind of intention!

Thank God, I arrived at my place safely.

Ironic thing is, the hamsap cabbie didn't even want to take the cab fare of RM8.90 from me. He said, (as he was enjoying the view of my chest level), "Adik lawa tak payah bayar. Boleh call I bila-bila..", and gave me a wink as his finishing act! Walaneh, I seriously want to pengsan when he said that secara hamsapnya. A breath later, I just said thanks and gave him a lopsided smile and drag my ass out of his cab ASAP...

THE END.

Apa lagi cerita lu olang mauuu??

playing truant..

I found this while going through my BBGS 1999 school magazine. I can't make it any bigger la.. Damn.. Click picture to read. ;)

mission aborted : 69% devious plan..

It started out as something devious that I had in mind.

Instead, the plan was forgotten and I turned into an angel and a sweetheart *muntah darah*. All of the planning to flirt senselessly and make the guy turn red was 'evaporated' when I look up at his innocent suci bersih murni face. I didn't even have the heart to tease him a little. ;Þ

Its refreshing thou', to know that there's still charming lurus bendul guys amongst the chauvinists who polutes the air of Kuala Lumpur these days. But I must say, charming lurus bendul guys must not be too blur, forgetful and have an appalling sense of directions (but its kindda cute to see him go senseless, haha). The ladies would second if I say, we ladies would rather you blur guys to take the lead.. *sweet smile*

notorious high schooler..

I've been tagged by Dixon a.k.a nama glamour nyer Zen Master to write about my notorious moments in high school. Since I gotta pei min (bagi muka) to the guy, I'll try to cough out something brief and straight forward without all the bombastic jargon shits..

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

#1 - Playing truant. I was the first ever BBGS sudent who received a pink colour warning letter from the Education ministry for not attending school for more than 3 months. Teachers didn't have faith in me and was expecting me to fail miserably in SPM. I proudly managed to give them out-of their-pants shock when I got my results - it was good enough to knock down all the teacher's pet.

#2 - Lust letters. Since its an all girls school, we had all lady teachers as well until one fine day, a male teacher joins in. He was handsome and was swarmed by love letters by young vigigis (vaginas). I could literally muntah darah so I wrote him an anonymous 'lust' letter. Don't really know what trully happened to him after that, all I heard was, he was transfered to some co-et school and was frightened to death of the thoughts of being molested. *smirk*

#3 - Keeping male in an all girls school. It was campfire 1997. Jess, Wei-yu and I decided to stay overnight in one of the classes and was accompanied by a male friend from St.John. Of course, our teachers and other girls doesn't know at that time cause if we were to kantoi, sure mampus exponentially lar. We had to hid him under stacks of desk when the schoolguard checks up on us. Poor guy.

#4 - Conteng dinding sekolah. But of course, I call it ART and CREATIVITY. A mural dedicated to my beloved alma mater. Not any mere humans can draw a cow that looks like a dog, you know. The art looks 'gourmet' btw, nicely drawn under the Centenary Wall of Fame. It's practically a Chagall. *show teeth*

#5 - Broke a teacher's favourite mug on purpose while she took a call from outside her cubicle. I never told anyone this. Not a soul. But I don't fcking care anymore, truth be told. She was a bitch, I did the right thing. *shrug*

#6 - I scoop cat shit and buried it in the long jump sand pad. For others to enjoy the aroma and texture of nature. ;)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Done.
That is all I can think of now.
I'm not going to tag anybody..doubt that they would pei min me. *yawn*

old and wiser (and cynical)

Celebrated my quarter century birthday in Chillis @ BSC with my closest peeps last Sunday. And we went off to chill in Somo @ Mont Kiara, a really nice place to have drinks and kingkai (thanks to literally-my-own-brother Amir who suggested the place).

One of the highlights of the night was when Joe-the-pâtissier made me this darn CUTE-giler-babi three tier cake with a Snoppy for my birthday! I told Joe that I would have kiss him senseless for being so darn sweet! Well..ONLY if he were a hunk with a sexy pout, haha! I'm amazed with Joe - who have changed his image drastically from a sweet faced boy to a clean-shaven botak tatooed guy. Despite the image shift, he remains as the sweet Joe I've known all along. Its a warm feeling to know that most of my old friends are still the same person underneath their heavy make-ups and macho manly act. *guffaw*

[from left first row: yours truly, Mir, Mut and Peng Hoong]
[from left 2cd row: Darren (Jess's hubby), Jess, Jenn Joe, Wei-yu]

*****

Let me introduce you to them:-

Jess is the longest I've known in the group. Known each other since we were 11 years old. She's practically my life diary and tempat mengadu emotional matters. And Darren, the hubby is the most polite proper matsalleh I've ever met... such a gentleman.

Wei-yu is my long lost twins, we think alike and like the same stuff most times and I can always count on her to catch me when I fall or when I'm short of cash, haha!

Amir is like my own brother whom I've known for 10 years. He's someone I bullied, someone I freeload cash, food and transportation from and am pampered like his own sister. Besides that, he can be quite a spoilt jerk! *guffaw*

Jenn Joe is Jess's church friend whom I met 12 years ago. We went to Add Math tuition together with Timothy the gay (or course Tim claims that he's not one) and Joe's just a sweetheart lar. He used to be somekind of a manager in Starbucks and I used to pau free coffee from him.. ;)

Mut is my Tamil hero idol.. hahaha! He's the most Malay-oriented Indian dude I've ever known and I love him to pieces cause he's just kind hearted and very patient. He teman my Mom and attended my graduation and make sure that my graduation picture is posted in UTM Skudai post. What more can I say?? Oh, and his Deepavali open house is something not to be miss every year! Ooohh.. and he suka janji keling.. (damn, my group memang racist la.. hahaha)

Peeeeennnggg @ Peng Hoong is the most true, calm and collected cinapek among all the cinapeks I know. He's short, sweet and simple, hahahaha! And he's a guy worth keeping. Sun ngor la Peng, Li Mun is still with you these past 7 years right?!

AAAaaaaawwwwww.......... I'm missing them already....

ama appa yingge ayo yo..

Had a chat with my chirpy aunt this morning.

It was all warm and light talks right until she mentioned 'marriage plan'. I managed to say something back in bullet-train mode (I believe it sounded as perfect as a full line of fluent Tamil with Britsh accent) and cut off the line....purposely. Whoop-see-daisies~!

Of course when she calls back, I blame the Telekom's line. *innocent smile*

[Warnings: Aksi ini tidak sesuai dilakonkan semula kepada makcik, pakcik atau kucing anda. Mereka mungkin akan rasa disindir dan anda mungkin dicakar. Proceed only with cautions.]

free as lady liberty..

I haven't felt relief in years.

It was all because I was carrying the shame and guilt of messing up a relationship that I trully believed would turn out to be really bumpy yet GREAT and satisfying to the soul, if it was given a chance. The kind of chemistry that comes once or twice in a lifetime.

But as of tonight, I am free of that burden.

Its both liberating and melancholic at the same time. I bet if he reads this, he would say, "Philosophical sial...!!", typical of him. But at last, I can trully put the past behind me. I no longer holds on to the hope for him to return and fulfill his promise. And frankly, I no longer want anything from him except for his own happiness.

Tonight is special. I had a great birthday present indeed,... INNER PEACE. Happy 25th birthday, Jannah Zarmani. ;)

/jann is beginning to smile again..