Okane, okane, okane!
....something that is scarce these days. Well, at least for me anyways. On top of that, having a family that could not support you is another thing. Not only you lose a place to rely on financially, the relationship within family members are also effected due to the frustration of not having enough money to eat or to pay the bills.
In my case, there's no one I can turn to except for my loyal close friends. I'm blessed to have these people who are willing to help me out when my pocket's in a bullimic state. Thou' I'm thankful that whenever I find myself financial stuck, its just sad that, often the people who help me is not my own family members.
I remember asking help from someone in my family. It taught me a lesson not to ask help from the person again, even if it means I have to eat bread and water for a year. Some say its pride (ego), I call it, harga diri (self-dignity). It's not the same. How low must you go down to ask help from your own flesh and blood? Its bad enough they're not willing to lend a hand, on top of that, they like to lecture like there's no tommorrow. And another thing I pantang datuk nenek is mengungkit....
Sigh, I'm tired of finding money. I really am.
I'm paying for 'debts' that's not even mine in the first place, sigh. And taking care of what is needed when it's not time for me to hold the reign as of yet. Where other peers can enjoy to stay home unemployed for months, I can't afford to have the same luxury. Sometimes I feel like my youth has gone wasted.
Maybe I should marry a rich guy and ask him to settle all the financial nonsense once and for all...maybe then, I'll be happy, walking down the street with a Stuart Weitzman stilettos without any care and problem in the world..
As for my family, they can have my Bata shoes..
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